[Birfy]

Fixes #495

What. People with access hid a live share once two friends had joined each other's invite (Bot Social regrants the second invite into the first relationship, so both homes recorded it as "joined" and the #383 guess classified the real share as talk-through). The owner could not see or Revoke it.

• plugins/social/src/mcp-client.js normalizeGrant: keep Bot Social's reply_only (as replyOnly) and side.
• plugins/social/src/social.js isTalkThroughGrant: when the server sends replyOnly, it is the only rule (true = talk-through, false = always a share). The joinedRelationships / roster guess stays only for servers without the field. accessRows keeps People with access lists the same friend twice when my already-shared Bot joins that friend's invite (talk-through grant shown as a share) #383's one row per person; a grant the server confirmed as a full share is never kept apart as a "possible talk-through" row.
• Docs: docs/subsystems/social.md; changelog fragment changelog.d/495-share-reply-only.fixed.md. No Bot Social change.

Test. New plugins/social tests (all fail without the fix): regranted share listed once and revocable on the r1 inviter's home (real join_invite flow) and on the joiner's home; a reply-only grant alone is never listed; the #383 case with reply_only keeps one row per person and Revoke leaves the talk-through grant; normalizeGrant keeps reply_only/side. Existing #178/#228/#303/#342/#383 tests pass unchanged.

Ran: ARCH_DOCS_BASE=origin/main TZ=UTC npm run verify (incl. plugin lint) at the tip: pass, 0 failures. Not run: live two-home repro against Bot Social prod, smoke bench.

Risk tier: T3 (estimate; the controller sets the label)

[Birfy]

Self-review: PASS
Tip SHA: 2bae5cd
Ran:

• ARCH_DOCS_BASE=origin/main TZ=UTC npm run verify (core lint + arch-docs, plugin lint, build-client --check, ds-bot-patches check, core/social/tree/timeline suites, .github scripts, interop, live-e2e unit): pass, 0 failures
• plugins/social --test-name-pattern="#495": 5/5 pass with the fix, 5/5 fail with the src change stashed
• plugins/social Granted friend Bot never shows for the grantee: the talk-through grant hides it (regression from the #161 fix) #178/Accept invite: 'Talk through' copy implies a Bot is granted back; People with access stays stale; Helper appears ~10 s after the toast #228/Accepting an invite briefly publishes the joiner's (unshared) Bot on the inviter's home: dead 'no longer shared with you' chat opens on load; friend invisible in Social #303/Accepting an invite never shows the inviter's Bot to the joiner, and the joiner's Chief lists the inviter in People with access (regression of #178 from #334) #342/People with access lists the same friend twice when my already-shared Bot joins that friend's invite (talk-through grant shown as a share) #383 tests: pass unchanged
• node .github/scripts/changelog.mjs check: well formed
• CI at the tip: all checks green incl. tests-ok; risk-gate: T3
• Diff reviewed against the owner design rules: per-Bot grants kept (reply-only grants never stored as shares, every non-reply-only grant listed and revocable), no publish, no server change, no UI copy change, scope limited to the owner's option (a)
  Not run:
• Live two-home repro (SelfA/SelfB) against Bot Social prod
• Smoke bench (dev/smoke.mjs), live Mac instances